In this paper I will talk about a TED talk video which is called Connected, but alone? by Sherry Turkle. She talked about how technology has impacted our lives to the point that we fear face-to-face communication. How people want to be together but always end up looking at their mobile phones. She also mentioned how communication lost its essence through time. I agree on everything she said in the talk because I believe in the saying communication is the key to any healthy relationships.
`There are things that are better heard in personal. When we talk with other person through chat theres a chance that we will never know their true intentions. For example saying sorry to someone. How can I know if its sincere or not? I can not see how they look when saying it. Eye contact is one of the most important things when it comes to communicating. The eyes never lie tho. If someone is insincere or lying about something you will feel it when you look in their eyes.
I honestly prefer confrontations in personal instead of chat. When Sherry Turkle was asked whats wrong with having conversation, she answered it takes place in real time and you cant control what you are going to say. and this is where people start to feel alone but scared of intimacy. Their more concerned in what image they should show to this person so they prefer texting because they are able to control what they say which is good but it loses the essence of communication.
People meeting up together but are more focused on their phones. My friends and I, every month we have this sleep over so we can catch up on whats happening on our lives. Theres a time that we went out to eat and we put all of our phones in the middle of the table (because some of them keeps playing mobile games i.e. Mobile Legends) the rule was the first person who gets their phone in the table will pay for our food unless it is an emergency. It really went well and effective. With that game, we communicated effectively and actually listening to each other attentively. We called that game lets talk like we are in the 90s because in the 1990s people would really gather up together and interact with each other. It actually saddens me when I visit coffee shops and I see couples or group of friends waiting for their food but instead of communicating with each other they are more invested in what they see on their social media. We should make each other feel like there is always someone that is willing to listen.
Learn when to stop. One example is when I am talking and the person Im talking to is too caught on their phone. If you were in my place, you would feel unwanted and annoyed too, right? Also when in meetings, there are people who keeps on texting and actually missing the whole point of the meeting itself. Theres no communication in that its just connection to social networks. People get easily distracted by smartphone. Sherry Turkle also said that Human relationships are rich, messy and demanding. This is one of the reasons why people choose connection than communication. Because communication takes place in real life and text is just opening your phone and sending a text. But people should know that communication only starts when you out your phone down actually starts talking and listening to each other. It should be mutual. Make people feel that you care. Make them feel that youre interested.
In conclusion, people should know their limits when it comes to using mobile phones. Communication is the key to any healthy relationships, so put your phone down and actually start having a conversation. Eye contact is very important. A mutual interest. You talk, I listen. I talk, you listen. Dont make people feel like they are unwanted or boring because you keep on looking at you mobile phone. It should be communicating in person over texting.