A popular saying goes, “Marriage involves three rings: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.”
If it is commonly felt that marriage is so difficult, why do most people wish to get married? Probably, the instinct to find a mate is inherent in human beings; and I am no exception. Somehow, I believe that there is someone out there who was made specially for me, and, once I find him, we will fall in love, and get married; and only then will I feel complete.
So, how will I recognise my Mrs Right? What qualities should I be looking for?
First of all, I am not looking for “Mrs Tall, and pretty”. Character is more important than looks. I cannot deny that I am attracted to good-looking girl, but marrying solely for physical attraction will probably lead to short term pleasure but life-long regret. I have also noticed that beautiful girl are often vain and arrogant, which I find most unattractive.
One of the main things that I admire in a women is humility. Such a women will not boast about his wealth, intelligence or achievements, but, instead appreciate other people’s abilities and achievements. She will also readily admit when he has made a mistake. Such a women would be a joy to live with.
Good communication is the key to any solid relationship, most of all, marriage. I would want my future wife to share her thoughts with me. I want to hear her dreams and to share in her struggles. On the other hand, I will also need someone who will be ready to listen to me, and interested to know what is happening in my life. There should be no secrets between us.
Life is full of challenges. We can expect to face failure as well as success; heartache as well as joy; boredom as well as excitement. So, the perfect wife should have a positive attitude and a good sense of humour. She should be witty and say things which make me laugh. The perfect wife would also be one who can see the silver lining behind every cloud, rather than focus on the flaws in every situation. With such a women, I will be encouraged to look at life in a happier and more positive way.
Above all other qualities, the perfect wife will be faithful. She must be someone who really believes in that marriage is made to last “till death do us part”. She will be totally committed to our relationship, and willing to stay for the long haul, “in sickness and in health, for better or for worse”; as couples promise in the wedding vows. The perfect wife would not be distracted by other man; not even when I have lost my looks. In return, I will also promise my total loyalty and faithfulness to my future wife.
Actually, there are many other qualities that make a women perfect wife material. For example, one obvious quality would be the ability to provide; and, though it is not the most important quality, physical attraction must be a part of the equation for a marriage to work well. However, while it is easy to make lists, finding a women to live up to them will be very difficult. Furthermore, instead of focusing on my requirements for the perfect wife, I think I should recognise my own imperfections, and set about correcting them. As Barnett Brickner said, “Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate.”